Piano Recital, etc

Our niece, Lindsay, stayed with us again this weekend. She knows all our routines and falls right in with them. Lindsay had been sleeping in a pack-n-play, but she woke up crying last weekend that she wanted to sleep in her big girl bed, so she slept in Derek's bed this weekend. Derek and Adam always like to sleep together, but we only allow it on non-school nights; since it was the weekend Derek slept in Adam's room. Lindsay took advantage of the additional room - she's all over the place when she sleeps - from one end of the bed to other, but she slept well.

It was a nice overcast and blustery weekend, almost Fall-like as the remnants of hurricane Fay pass through. We went on walks and the always kid-pleasing trip to the grocery store where they get complimentary popcorn and a cookie.

We've enjoyed the Beijing Olympics the past couple of weeks. The boys have really been into it. We've relaxed our tv restrictions during the Olympics and let them watch a lot more tv - as long as they were watching the Olympics. Our after bath routine each evening has included some Olympic viewing time before story time.

On Sunday, Derek and Adam had a piano recital. This was Derek's 5th recital and Adam's 1st. They both did a great job. Adam is very workman-like and serious as he hunches over the piano and pounds out his notes. Derek always seems to rise to the occasion during performances and adds some personality and flair above and beyond the way he practices. Helen's parents were there as well. Afterwards, we went out for a nice celebration dinner at Ippolito's and then they took Lindsay home with them for the week.

Farewell, Madison

We took some photos the night before we put Madison down

Our first dog, Brandy. She was a great frisbee dog - even in the snow.


Our second dog, Bailey. What a sweetie.

Madison as a puppy

On Friday, I took Madison, our lab, to the vet to be put to sleep. I made the appointment several days ahead of time so that everyone could give her some extra loving. She was 13 years old.

Brandy, a cocker-lab mix, was our first dog. We got Brandy when we first started dating almost 20 years ago. She was a great frisbee catcher. She moved with us from our apartment to our house. Unfortunately, Brandy started acting up and snarling whenever we disciplined her. Helen got to where she was scared of Brandy. One evening Helen had to lock Brandy in a bathroom because Brandy had turned on Helen. I came home from work and immediately dropped Brandy off at the vet and told them to put her down because she would no longer take discipline. I didn't actually stay, so I don't know if they actually put her down or not. I'm black and white on the master\pet relationship, so it was a "no-brainer" decision for me, but we both still bawled.

Bailey, a black lab, was our second dog. We got her soon after moving into our house. My brother's wife, Laine, was in Knoxville visiting a college friend whose dog had a new litter of puppies. Laine thought that Brandy might like a pal. She was a very gentle and sweet dog and never gave us much trouble. She wasn't overly affectionate and was fine staying in her own space, which is better than following you around everywhere - like Madison.

Bailey had a gentle\sad disposition anyway, but she seemed to miss Brandy so we decided to get another dog. We answered an ad in the paper and drove to a run down shack of a place near Athens and picked out Madison. We picked her because she seemed to have the most spunk of the litter. We thought, compared to Bailey, it might be nice to get a dog with a little more personality.

It wasn't long before Madison chewed the cushions on our new sofa and chewed holes in our new carpet. For a few years, we had to crate her while we were gone. She was somewhat neurotic. She followed us from room to room, panted uncontrollably during any storm, picked her food out of her bowl to eat on the carpet, always took a dump when you walked her - even if she'd just taken one in the yard before the walk, etc. She could also be very sweet. She thought she was a lap dog and would drape herself on you whenever you watched tv. She and Bailey got along well and were pals for a long time. They especially loved it when we took them to the river to play. They slept in our bed with us and we spoiled them.

Eventually, we had kids. We bought a van so there would be enough space for the dogs too. Of course, it wasn't long before the kids took over our lives and the dogs were relegated to the much lower position of barely sufferable. Although we had the van, we rarely took them anywhere with us. They got kicked out of our bed and when we addressed them it was to tell them to "move", "get out of the way", "hurry up", etc.. The dogs eventually got more affection once the kids got a little older.

So that only leaves Lula, the dachsund we adopted a year ago from a lady at Helen's school, and Grayson, a cat Helen adopted after she found it roaming the halls at her school. Before Grayson, we used to have a black cat, Atreides, but we found him crying in the garage one day and rushed him to the vet. He died on the way and the vet said he had suffered some internal injuries as if he had been hit by a car.

As much as I'm ready to be pet free, I still cried going through old pictures for this blog post. I think it's because with any loss, it's not necessarily the final act that makes you sad, it's all the associated memories. I find it comes in waves. You feel like you're at peace with the loss and, wham, it hits you and you don't even see it coming.

All the old photos of the dogs remind me of just how fast life has passed; of our early marriage years; of all the hopes and dreams of younger days; of buying our house; of empty rooms that would one day hold children we didn't yet know and now cannot believe haven't always been a part of our lives.

The years passed so fast - Derek will be 10 in the spring. We should have packed the dogs in the van and gone on a picnic more often.

Lindsay and Brooke Come To Visit

The girls loved seeing their Daddy

Our nieces, Lindsay and Brooke, have been visiting from time to time while their Mom and Dad recover from their medical issues. The girls are very sweet and we've enjoyed them immensely.

Orientation and First Day of School

Here are some pictures from orientation the week before school and from the first day of school. Our niece, Lindsay, went along with us to orientation. Everyone wanted to know how we snuck the third kid in without them knowing. Adam is in 1st grade and Derek is in 4th. Adam acts like a veteran now and Derek's excited that 4th graders are allowed to ride their bike to school.

Mike and Chris

Helen's brother, Mike, and his wife, Chris, have been going through a very difficult time. About a month ago, Chris was about due to have a new baby, when Mike had to have emergency kidney surgery. Unfortunately, a mass was also discovered on the other kidney. Because of Chris's condition a plan was hatched to allow Mike a few weeks of recovery, have the baby and allow Chris a few weeks of recovery for the c-section, and then Mike would undergo surgery on the other kidney.

Mike had a few weeks of recovery before Chris delivered beautiful baby Brooke. With help from family and friends they were making it. But, on Monday of last week Chris had a seizure in her sleep. She was rushed to the hospital where it was determined that she had a ruptured brain aneurysm and then put on a Life Flight helicopter to another hospital. The doctors also discovered another unruptured aneurysm. She underwent surgery and the prognosis is good, although she is not out of the woods and the recovery will be long.

Mike is trying to handle as much as he can and still recuperate himself and try to run his business. Family and friends have been helping. The family has been passing Brooke and her big sister, Lindsay who is 2, around. Helen and I watched Lindsay a couple nights last week and then had both girls this past weekend. We got lots of shocked looks in the neighborhood when we showed up with 2 little girls all of the sudden. It brought back the old days of early morning feedings and diaper changes.

The girls were great and they're holding up well, in spite of everything. Mike came by on Sunday and visited along with Helen's parents who were taking the girls back home. Helen's brother, Paul, and his wife, Agatha, are going to keep baby Brooke and Helen's parents are going to keep Lindsay. We'll probably be on weekend duty for a while.

Home Improvement

Our plan has been to do minimal aesthetic maintenance to our house since the kids and pets just trash the place. Then, when the kids are gone and the pets are dead, fix up the house, sell it, and buy a new home. It's nice not worrying too much about the house as it's being trashed.

Despite our plan, about once a year we allow ourselves to dream about possible home improvements we might make. We usually get bogged down for a day discussing various options before we wear ourselves out and forget about it.

We've come to realize that there are some things that we could do to enhance our enjoyment of the house and, at the same time, improve the value of the house. So, recently I decided to actually call a number of contractors, discuss some of our ideas, and get some rough estimates. I put together a detailed document on about 10 projects that we would like to have done. For example: redoing the front porch\steps\walkway\landscaping; replacing the stucco front with shake shingles, etc; redoing the master bath, adding on to the back of the house.

We were kind of hoping that the contractors would tell us that some of our ideas didn't make sense, so that we could forget about them, but it seems that, given enough money, anything is possible. We haven't even had anything done yet, but it's been quite a bit of effort just to think about what we might want to do and coordinate discussions with the contractors.

On the surface I look like an easy going guy and I am - as long as everything's in order. I really like having nothing on my mind - a "to do" list with 0 items and the freedom to allow my mind to flitter from one idle thought to another. I know that about myself and that's why I'm hesitant to engage in anything very big. I can't seem to make quick decisions. I have to weigh all the options and, rarely, is any decision a perfect decision. Instead, it usually involves compromises, which really bothers me to the core. My brain gets overloaded trying to search in vain for the perfect solution. Usually, I try to keep from getting myself into the infinite obsession loop by just not engaging at all.

Unfortunately, I'm currently engaged...and obsessing.

Off and Running

Helen is back at school this week so the boys have been staying with Helen's parents (aka Camp Nanna and Poppy). The boys love going over there. We dropped them off on Sunday night and have had a few kid-less days. It's been nice.

We did our normal last week of Summer vacation dance where I get really geared up for everything to be organized for the start of the rat race and for any loose ends to get tied up, while Helen gets sluggish and withdrawn. Her conversational responses get slower and slower as she enters into a sort of fog. I have to tell her not to "slow response" me.

I finally finished organizing the playroom - we'll see how long that lasts. I also helped Helen finish painting some of the nautical themed things that she bought for Adam's room...about 5 years ago!

I've really enjoyed walking the hallway of the house this week with the boys gone and seeing that all the rooms are staying nice and orderly. Is that so wrong? Normally any trip through the house for me involves addressing a handful of things that one of the people or pets screwed up. I can usually take one or two things, but eventually I get pushed over the edge and it leads to one of my "can't everyone just take care of their own business" rants, which leads to Helen asking me again if I need to build my own room in the garage.

Helen's first day was much better than she expected. The school got a new principal and some new administrators. The new administration addressed the fact that the previous administration did not do a good job of supporting the teachers and they committed to do a better job this year, which is exactly what the teachers wanted to hear. It makes all the difference when you work for management that you respect. It was really wearing her down the last couple years working for people she didn't respect. Although the teachers are happy that the previous principal is gone, they're sickened by the fact that it's because he was promoted.